Diana HelmuthOlympic Categories for MillennialsTouching Someone Else’s Cat Contestants judged on: Squat form; slow blinking; enunciation of “pspspsps.”Aug 13Aug 13
Diana HelmuthI Hate October.I have a confession: I hate October. I am aware this is an opinion bordering on excommunicative for my identity as both a white woman and…Oct 25, 2023Oct 25, 2023
Diana HelmuthI Spent a Year Trying to Turn Myself Into a Witch. Here’s What Happened.We are in a Witch heyday. Witchcraft has been the fastest growing religion in the US for at least the past 10 years. One peek at TikTok and…Aug 4, 20232Aug 4, 20232
Diana HelmuthIf You Want to Feel Better, Celebrate Lammas (Which is Today)Let me open this essay by saying: I am not a spiritual leader. I do not aspire to be a spiritual leader, and I am not trying to sell you…Jul 31, 20231Jul 31, 20231
Diana HelmuthinSlackjawWhen Human Life Definitely Begins, According to All These Different PeopleDon’t worry, together we can make sure you have the correct opinion.May 26, 20224May 26, 20224
Diana HelmuthinAn Injustice!Belle Should Have Married Lumiere. There I Said ItOn a cross-country flight last week, I found myself with exactly 89 minutes to kill and my finger hovering over the Play button on a…Nov 22, 202119Nov 22, 202119
Diana HelmuthIf I Don’t Know How to Mourn You, Can I Make It Up?I walk towards the homeless encampment carefully. Which is to say, as if it’s not there.Aug 5, 2021Aug 5, 2021
Diana HelmuthWhy I Prefer Working With MomsWe’ve all seen it. If you are capable of growing babies in your body and also desire to work outside the home, you’ve probably felt it: the…May 12, 20211May 12, 20211
Diana HelmuthinThe Bold ItalicVitamin Supplements to Help You Manage FascismSupplements to help you de-stress while democracy failsSep 22, 20202Sep 22, 20202
Diana HelmuthinThe Bold ItalicMy Attempt at Actual ‘Social’ DistancingWe may be physically isolating, but we’re completely overindulging in online communicationAug 31, 2020Aug 31, 2020